Men, don't end up like this
poor twat!
| | The Evil that Women Do | Perhaps Im merely bitter following another difficult and complicated break-up. Perhaps Ive just consumed one beer too many. Whatever the reason, as I sat here at my computer this evening, contemplating the significance of table tennis, inspiration struck. If anything, this inspiration is a continuation of the epiphany that I had not so long back that all women are psychotic and most of them are evil. However, on this very night, a voice inside my head (one of many, I might add but my shrink says thats perfectly normal) told me the way to go. Its time for men to fight back!
Those of you that dared to read my earlier piece up here on BabyFatHead; entitled Times Are A-Changing (yes, both of you!) will already be familiar with my warped mind and my views on feminism. Well, I have now devised a solution to counteract feminism. Its time to usher in the age of MANANISM!
It will be a slow and rigorous process and it wont happen overnight, but I truly believe that by putting in some hard work and making the ultimate sacrifice of peeling ourselves away from the television set, us men can re-establish ourselves as human beings and retain a shred of the dignity that we have lost in recent years.
However, Im just one man. And the world isnt going to listen to a delusional, disturbed, albeit handsome; young man, so I need your help. We all know theres power in numbers, and to gain your support, I intend to prove that mine is a just cause. To do this, Id like to provide you with some evidence to back up my theories concerning the mental faculties of women and encourage you to jump on the MANANISM bandwagon.
<*dv_0*> Point number one. Why is it that women can say one thing and mean the exact opposite? Why would they do that? Of course I dont mind if you leave me at home by myself tonight and go out with your friends We all know that this is a lie! Would it not have been easier to say something along the lines of: Id really rather you stayed in tonight and spent some time with me? Think about it. If a man wanted someone to pass him his beer, would he say: Please dont pass me that beer?
Point number two. Now we have the infamous technique of asking a question where there is no correct answer. A good example of this is where youre out with your girlfriend and you happen to walk by another girl. Do you think shes more attractive than I am? There really is no appropriate way to answer this. You say yes and youll need an icepack attached to your genitalia for the next few weeks. Your instincts tell you to go with no. But do this and be prepared for the unexpected. So youre telling me that you were looking at her while you were out with me? They can twist it on you in a second. A more carefully planned out answer would be, what girl? I havent been able to take my eyes off of you. Indeed, it sounds like a good response, but even then you can be hit with something like: Oh, you never pay attention! Its a no-win situation. From personal experience, Ive found that whenever you get asked a question like this, the best thing to do is drop down to the floor and start clutching your stomach. This serves two purposes. Firstly, it changes the subject, and secondly, women love to see men in pain. So the story has a happy ending.
Point number three. Why is it that if you make the mistake of going shopping with a woman, theyll always drag you into clothes shops where theyll proceed to try on every single item in the store, ask for your opinion when they know you dont care and then leave the store five hours later, having purchased nothing at all? Its just another mystery of life. But this mystery can be solved when you remember what I said in the previous paragraph women love to see men in pain.
That was just a small selection of points proving that women are insane and need to be stopped, or at least tamed. A fuller range of points will be available in my forthcoming book, The Mananist Movement, which will soon be available in all good sanatoriums and nuthouses. For now, keep your eyes open. MANAMISM will soon be a force to be reckoned with!
<*dv_1*> Submitted by Lee Baker
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