<*dv_1*>Kevin was born confused, irritable and somewhat disappointed in 1975. However, he recovered from this sluggish start to become one of the finest and biggest-cheeked 'It' girls of his generation. After writing several series of award-winning sitcom Butterflies under the pen-name Carla Lane, his career stalled in the late 70s. Ah, the 70s - the golden age of cocaine and Afros. Kevin snorted his first Afro at the age of four. He loved how inhaling the tight curls made him sneeze. Sadly, he was arrested for Afro possession in 1981 after trying to smuggle Earth Wind and Fire's rhythm section through Heathrow Airport customs. How was he supposed to know they'd been tipped off by an insanely jealous Bootsy Collins<*dv_0*>? After rehab and a highly-publicised affair with Betty Ford he got his life back on track and took up a missionary position in Zaire, trying to teach tennis to local tribesmen.
He now lives in Scotland, feeding laxatives to penguins and telling weird jokes to dirty children. |
